In a complex statement today, the foreign office has announced plans to look into exporting human legs, initially by way of cadavers but eventually by force from living, breathing human beings.
The emerging Asian markets are demanding increasing supplies of Anglo Celtic legs for aphrodisiac purposes and it seems that supply is struggling to catch up to demand.
The UK Foreign Minister has said that if existing supplies cannot be increased then a two fold plan to extract legs from people aged 45 or more would be initiated. Speculation as to how this would work seems to suggest that a national lottery would be instituted and people within the age group would be chosen at random and given, say, 12 hours to state a case why they shouldn't donate their leg for the good of British trade.
The Minister refused to confirm if people with plastic or wooden legs would be exempted from the scheme.
Obviously this plan calls for hard thinking not just "leg pulling".
