There were sensational scenes in Beverly Hills on Friday, when camp television medium Derek Acorah "went beserk" and hurled a celebration coconut cream cake at the head of pastry-faced ex-royal butler Paul Burrell.
Acorah, who was with a television crew filming celebrity exorcisms in the homes of Hollywood stars, was in Rodeo Drive with best friend Yvette Fielding shopping for 9 carat gold sovereign rings, when he spotted the celebrity servant in the street outside.
"It was terrifying. He suddenly lost control of his limbs and began shouting gibberish" Fielding told reporters "One minute he was complaining that the shop was twice as expensive than Argos, the next his head dropped to his chest, his wrists went limp and he started looking shyly from behind his fringe and fluttering his eyelashes".
Onlookers described the scene as "horrible" as Acorah began yelling that Burrell was "a treacherous lying bastard" who "stole my jewellery and keeps telling everyone he was my best friend. He only came to the palace to clean my upholstery".
According to Fielding, Acorah, who sounds uneducated but can turn into a Pendle witch at the drop of a hat, then walked out of the shop "as if in a trance" and followed Burrell into a nearby celebrity eatery. Eyewitness Joan Rivers (92) told reporters that the girly friend of the dead minced in "tossing his hair" and grabbed a $5,000 coconut cream gateau from a stand, muttering "I'll give him a rock, the sycophantic tosser. I only took him to Angola to carry my handbag" and threw it at Burrell, narrowly missing Victoria Beckham who was enjoying a stick of celery and a cup of hot water.
"He just chucked it at him" Rivers screeched gruffly, "It was hilarious, I laughed so much I thought I was going to throw up my bacon baguette". Acorah was unavailable for comment yesterday, but his best friend Paul O'Grady told reporters "I blame the Princess of Wales for all this. Diana's been talking to Derek through his spirit guide for years. A couple of months ago she told him to pin a dead hedgehog on Camilla Parker-Bowles's back at Balmoral and last week she told him to go to Selfridges and pop a Roberto Cavalli shirt in his bag without paying".
