Poland, the dark and eerie Eastern European country, is to become the fifth member of the United Kingdom, and immigrants from Poland will, from 10 June, be accorded the same rights as those accorded to UK-born citizens.
The news, which comes before the Euro 2008 football championships, will mean that Poland can now be officially classed as a Home Nation, and Britons will be free to support Poland at the event, as England didn't qualify.
Poles living in this country rejoiced at the news this morning, and got drunk, which is normal for them. Critics of Poles have said it is sometimes difficult to tell just exactly when they are drunk, and when they are not, so glassy-eyed are they in their normal state.
Tomasz Kuszczak, the Manchester United goalkeeper ruled out of the Euro 2008 championships with a drinking injury sustained during training, said:
"Witam! Duzo piwo!", which in English, means:
"Hello! Lots of beer!"
