Written by IN SEINE

Sunday, 10 February 2008

image for Headless Corpse Named As Abu Hamza
It's what your right hand's for!

Detectives investigating the death of a man whose decapitated body was found behind a row of shops in north London have identified the body as that of Abu Hamza who was jailed for seven years in 2007 for inciting racial hatred in London's Finsbury Park Mosque. and suspected of organising terrorist training camps in Oregon.

The body was easily identified by the hook on his right arm and scratches to his genitalia and was found wrapped in a blood-stained duvet in a supermarket goods cage in Kilburn. Tesco want to assure the public that the goods cage will be thoroughly disinfected before being used again.

Although Hamza was convicted last year, he has in fact been in custody since May 2004 and has therefore done half of his sentence already. It was suspected that he has been let out at weekends as part of his rehabilitation into society.

The crime is thought to be an 'honour' killing by an Islamic extremist group calling itself "Ugly Jihad 33' over his refusal to wear a veil.

An unnamed spokesman told In Seine News;

"It had to be done - people who are so ugly cannot go around representing Islam - it could frighten small children. Besides, we thought that Sharia Law was already in force in the UK. The Archbishop of Canterbury has misled us!"

It has been disclosed that Police do not want to find the head because it is so ugly.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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