Whitehall - (Ass Mess): "Crisis? What crisis? It's nothing more than a pathetic, scurrilous rumor."
That was all that UK Prime Monster Gorgon Brown could say today about persistent reports that Labour's very own Black Monday is about to strike at the very core of government.
All weekend financial and economic forecasters have warned about the City going into meltdown early on Monday 26 November as the headlines break about yet another scandal to hit the country.
As if that wasn't bad enough a breaking story at the Met's Serious & Disorganised Fraud Squad has hinted that a number of non-dom foreign tossers such as Prince Jefri Archer and Roman Abramovich are about to get the same HMP Belmarsh treatment as Amy Winehouse's husband Flake Bleeder-Weevil.
But Brown is having none of it.
"We can easily barricade ourselves inside No 10 just like Margaret Thatcher and John Major before us," a confident Prime Monster chuckled today.
Meanwhile in cyberspace internet spread-betting index Aintogottaprayer.com is sifting with Hellfire Club soothsayers:
"We reckon 11/10FAV there could be a military coup d'etat imminently that will see the Labour Party and most of the Tories in the slammer before the day is out."
Camilla is under sedition.
