Written by matthatt

Thursday, 24 May 2007

image for Control Orders not working, spanking to follow!
Just one of the many forms of punishment available.

Home Secretary John Reid has been accused of endangering the public as police continue to hunt three terror suspects on control orders who have absconded.

A total of six individuals are now known to have gone missing while under control orders, which impose a loose form of house arrest on those suspected of involvement with international terrorism.

"These criminals just can't be trusted" said Shadow home secretary David Davis "John Reid has got a lot to answer for"

The home Secretary has issued the next level of control punishment for these ne're do wells who obviously don't respond to being told to stay indoors. "I have been left no choice but issue a severe spanking order on these up to no gooders" said Mr. Reid.

The public have been asked to keep an eye out for these men as there aren't enough policemen to do so, but under no circumstances are they to administer the spanking themselves, any flagellation required, will be carried out under strict police supervision.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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