Branson launches $25m climate prize

Funny story written by queen mudder

Friday, 9 February 2007

image for Branson launches $25m climate prize
"Al Gore found the $25 million prize fund in a jiffybag in Baghdad"

London - (Rotters): A $25 million Earth Challenge Prize is being offered by Richard Branson to whoever comes up with the best way of removing significant amounts of George W Bush's envirnomental policies from the agenda at the UN Security Council.

Launching the PR stunt in London with has-been Democratic Vice President Al Gore, Branson, 59, was unable to say exactly where the dosh comes from.

But Gore gave the game away by saying he just happened to find it in a disused sack outside Baghdad Airport in 2004.

This was after George Bush ordered an airdrop of $12 billion in large jiffybags following US generals' recommendations to use the same rescue techniques that proved popular in earthquake-stricken regions such as the Pakistan/Kashmir borders

"Some of the Baghdad emergency relief parcels could have fallen into wrong hands", said Gore, "so I rescued a few and here they are."

Branson then said: "Humankind must realise the scale of the crisis we are facing.

"Sure I could fly the planes on corn oil or distilled hempseed. But we have to find a method of removing one billion tonnes of carbon per year from the atmosphere.

"Bush has done a deal with the UN to protect cattle from global slaughter. But as everybody knows cows produce more CO2 emmissions per annum by way of methane than all the cars and planes put together.

"Whoever gets him to cull the cows gets our dosh."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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