Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 20 December 2018

image for Drone Shaved Man's Beard
Dave pre-drone

A low-flying drone being operated in the vicinity of Gatwick Airport, is said to have flown so low, that it was able to pick out an individual target and shave off the whole of his fullsome beard.

The man, Dave Harris, a portly gentleman of around 57, was out taking a stroll with his dog, Wayne, when the animal started to yelp, and dance around its owner. As Harris looked up, the drone swooped down, and, in a flourish that would have impressed the nifty-fingered Edward Scissorhands, clipped and snipped at Dave's beard until it was no more.

A clean-shaven Dave returned home to his wife, who hasn't fancied him for more than twenty years. She told him:

"Lose a couple of tyres from around your belly, and we'll be in business!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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