Written by MarkMaguire_

Friday, 21 July 2017

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The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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There have been calls this morning for people crap at their jobs to become the highest earners at their respective companies.

After the BBC released it's 'higher earner' document this morning, there have been questions asked why professional ginger Chris Evans is the highest earner after he took a massive shit all over their precious Top Gear 'brand', losing 5 billion viewers.

Thomas Quim of Jags Office Supplies called us to say: "Last year I got a final written warning for wanking in the stationery cupboard and I lost £50,000 in orders when I told a major firm we supply to fuck off. Where's my financial reward for being so shit. As usual, it's one rule for us normal people and another form famous gingers".

The BBC were unavailable for comment as they are currently undertaking their sixteenth diversity review of the week.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: work




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