Delta Airlines has taken a bold stand against unruly passengers, declaring an end to tolerating disruptive behavior on their flights. In a statement from a company spokesperson, Delta expressed frustration over the unnecessary inconveniences cause…
NATCHEZ, Mississippi - (Satire News) - The United Americana News Agency reports that a Delta airline jet that was bound from Natchez to Detroit, was not allowed to take off. UANA reporter Lottie Bungalow, reported that Buloxi pole dancer was not…
According to experts there are about 40 million airplane flights, worldwide every year. That's a lot of pollution - (21 pounds of CO2 produced per gallon of fuel). We might have to switch back to beautiful cruise ships to travel. Wouldn't th…
Like trying to run Great Britain without a cabinet, can Prime Minister Boris Johnson fly a 787 Dreamliner all alone? Maybe if there’s an automatic pilot, but could he land the super jumbo jet at night during a rain storm? Not so easy. Great Britain i…
CHICAGO - (Satire News) - The world of passengers has become even more competitive than ever before. US airlines are trying to outdo each other as far as flying perks go. Delta has said that they want their flyers to be extremely comfortable an…
CHICAGO - (Satire News) - The airlines are scrambling like hell to lure passengers away from other airlines, as many airlines are losing money left and right and right and left. Jet Blue has announced that in an effort to lure flyers away from Del…
PEORIA, Illinois - (Satire News) - The Supersonic Concorde went belly up due to the Trumpapalooza Virus, problems with the on-board compass mechanism, and the fact that it's astoundingly fast speed basically scared the shit out of a lot of seasoned p…
CARACAS, Venezuela - (Satire News) - An Air Venezuela commercial pilot has informed the World Airways Guild (WAG) that on a recent flight from Caracas to El Segundo, California, he and one of his flight attendants saw an extremely weird-as-hell sight…
DETROIT – (Satire News) – The Detroit Metropolitan Wayne County Airport has had a large amounts of delays due in part to the jet plane shortage, as well as the jet fuel shortage. Detroit Metro Airport spokesperson Jessica F. Wackowitz, 42, stated…
SOMEWHERE OVER IOWA – (Satire News) – Sky Blue Airlines has just confirmed that two of their cockpit crew members did in fact get into an altercation while 30,000 feet up in the sky. An airline spokewoman, identified as Virginia Liliana Tippenkunt…
Abort is a term used to stop a plane from a dangerous landing or taking off. We have to abort, is a phrase frequently used in films and television. Taking off from SFO for a direct flight from San Francisco to London in a relatively new Boeing Tr…
DALLAS – (Satire News) - Southwest Airlines has informed the flying public that they have decided to combine air travel with sports and they’ve decided to add on-board cage matches on most flights. Southwest said that due to the recent 710% incre…
Transit Security Administration employee Mark Roberts brings laser-focused attention to detail to his position at John F. Kennedy International Airport. As Roberts put it, “The second you put on that uniform, you gotta be on. That’s the job.” A...
It seems the days of cheap and nasty flights are not quite over as one of its most infamous proponents is making every option an optional extra. Passengers flying on 'Leprechaun Airways' will be charged for check-in (online or otherwise), hold lug...
Scientists from the Seattle Technology Institute National College (STINC) have achieved a major breakthrough in recycling technology. Spokesperson Violet Funk explained. "STINC specializes in recycling human and animal waste, with a focus on conve...
On October 13th, a Colorado man jumped out of an airplane to go skydiving with his wife, saying that he could fly. Moments later, after numerous attempts, his parachute malfunctions. Tragically, the outcome was fatal. His wife commented on his be...
Washington D.C. - The Federal courts have cleared the way for Americant Airlines to use THIS new invention to double passenger payload. The Federal courts have cleared the way for Americant Airlines to use THIS new invention to double passenger pa...
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