Written by Backandtotheleft

Thursday, 19 June 2014

image for Chinese UK Visit Takeaway
Ladies, call me.

The Chinese Premier has visited London this week for talks with the PM over forging more business links with the UK. We at Back and to the Left news aren't naive and we know that trade=good, but we also can't resist sticking our opinions in where there obviously not required or even wanted.

Knowing our dear PM as well as we do (about as well as we do our dads) we have the felling he won't be confident enough to mention Chinas appalling human rights record. He won't even talk about immigration in an adult way without coming over with a hot flush.

However we will.

Obviously getting a interview with the Chinese Premier is a little difficult without "proper security clearance and almost impossible with "several convictions for fighting paintings of famous people".

So we did the next best thing and spoke to someone who has been affected by the regime.

The phone rang for several seconds before an exacerbated voice came from the other end.

"Hello Peeking Duck what can I get you?"

Hard hitting political insight on the social climate that dominates Chinese culture? This is what we wanted, this is what the world needs. Your country is a massive enigma riddled with corruption and insanity but your government keeps an iron grip on the country and refuses to give Tibet back. How? How does somewhere that has concentration camps for political prisoners be pandered (pun) to by every so called civilised nation instead of been called out for the bunch of religiously oppressive land grabbers they are?

"Would you like rice with that?"

Yes, yes we would

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: China, Human Rights

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