Depressed Peat Bog Diagnosed as Paranoid Schizophrenic

Written by Auntie Jean

Wednesday, 2 April 2014

The Post Glacial Depressed Peat Bog at Craig-y-Llyn in Glamorgan, Wales has been recently undergoing treatment for acute depression. A second opinion from psycho-phytologist, Denise R. Scuft indicated a deep rooted schizm of the anterior sphagnatum.

The setting up of a pseudo self help group of clinically psychotic Welsh Bogs was recommended and carried out in January 2014 after complaints from locals of nocturnal groaning and sighing coming from the near suicidal bog.

Residents of the housing estate next to the bog were asked to chat to it and if possible try to lift its spirits by asking it when its birthday is or where it went on holiday last year, so that it does not try to drown itself.

In February the treatment appeared to show promising results when the bog was overheard singing and occasionally whistling.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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