Written by Auntie Jean

Sunday, 16 February 2014

image for Sharks released into Somerset floods by Environment Agency and Conservation Dept.
A scavenger Shark

Twelve container loads of Large White Sharks have been released into the Somerset flood regions by conservationists.

I spoke with an environment spokesperson who explained their actions: "These animals are natural clean up agents and will do a lot of good in the immediate term. For starters, we hope they will eat a lot of people who are whingeing, thereby allow us to get on with the job of doing nothing."

"This is going to be a lot easier than managing the flood plain building programs, repairing the infrastructure, making realistic drainage system repairs and building flood barriers." he added.

Barbara Busybody, a spokesperson for Somerset Needs Sharks (SNS), claimed to be very satisfied with the new project.

Ms Busybody explained to me: "Wildlife is much more important than the well being of the human residents! How dare these people deny these beautiful creatures the habitat they deserve by pumping away all their precious water. It just beggars belief how cruel and selfish people really can be."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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