Written by j.w.

Wednesday, 31 July 2013

image for Jellyfish Told To Go Home
Jellyfish Invasion Outcry

Jellyfish who have illegally settled in the UK have been told to Go Home by the Government. Ice Cream vans have been touring seaside resorts, where these illegal immigrants are known to be lurking, in an effort to get them to leave before they are prosecuted.

Bing Crosby who is currently advising the Tories on how to win the next election is sure the campaign will gain electoral support at the grassroots. 'I spoke to the Daily Mail and they are in favour of kicking out against these unwanted Jellyfish' he has told PM David Cameron.

'The people have spoken' Cameron told a back bench committee 'it is clear that the British people want to see the back of these Jellyfish.'

However Nick Clegg, Deputy PM has said the campaign against Jellyfish is foolish. 'They are doing no harm here' he told a bunch of holiday makers on the Blackpool sands 'in fact they make quite a good meal. I recommend Jellyfish Soup!'

Cameron is planning to ban all pictures of Jellyfish from the internet in an effort to win women to his cause. His adviser Bing Crosby is confident that making a fuss about prawns is a vote winner.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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