Written by IainB

Monday, 16 July 2012

image for Tracey Emin's new exhibit hailed a critical success
This ten pence piece was found under some leaf litter, and sold for three hundred thousand pounds.

Foremost British Female Artist with Attitude, Tracey Emin's latest exhibition has been hailed her most daring work yet.

BBC Art Correspondent, Will Gompertz, has visited the latest works by Emin and has nothing but good words to say about it.

"It's goddam awful," he said. "Absolute rubbish. What a waste of twenty minutes of my life. I couldn't bear to be there longer than that, and I'm glad, or I'd have slit my wrists at the futility of the state of art in this country."

With such high praise, dozens have been flocking to see what all fuss is about.

"I was blown away," said Gillian McKeith, one big Emin fan who had travelled from her house next door to the exhibit to view it. "And once I'd battled the gale to get into the exhibition, I realised what all the fuss is about."

Other critics have announced that the completely empty room is testament to Emin's genius. How that there is not one sculpture, picture or pile of poo shows that Emin has truly redefined the limits of art itself.

"The new works are an example of how the absence of art is art in itself," said Tom Pustwit, Emin's manager, bestest friend in the world, and hair stylist. "The room itself is completely empty. Devoid of anything except the walls of the building. There are a few windows, but they're part of the infrastructure, displaying how the absence of art counteracts the structure and stricture of modern establishment."

Emin is flabbergasted at the critical acclaim.

"They put the sign over the wrong building," she said. "All the stuff I made is in the gallery across the road. Not that I'm complaining. Some daft sod bought A Gallon of Empty Space. I'm going to deliberately do this next time. It saves a lot of work. My hairstylist is a freakin genius."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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