Rebekah Brooks' ex-husband Ross Kemp 'might also have ridden Met horse Raisa'

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 13 March 2012

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image for Rebekah Brooks' ex-husband Ross Kemp 'might also have ridden Met horse Raisa'
Rebekah WHO? was all that Kemp could manage this afternoon

London - Their June 2002 marriage fell at the post well before the seven year itch when the Missus' sharp backhander landed her overnight in a police cell on suspected spouse abuse charges.

This morning Ross Kemp was staying schtum as YouBoob! video footage of him emerged riding what may have been an ex-Met police horse.

Frenzied UK Red Tops have speculated whether it's the same mare Raisa whose saddle-weary frame has also accommodated PM Dave Cameron's ample bottom.

At the Cheltenham Festival this afternoon the former Eastenders soap actor (and suspected whorse whispere)r was on a roll after backing a string of winners.

"Rebekah? Rebekah who?" he chuckled gamely as he tucked thick wads of bookies' cash into a custom-built Festival wallet.

Meanwhile at Pratts Bottom Police Station in sunny Oxfordshire Mrs Brooks and her trusty brief were parrying questions from Operation Weeting cops.

The 6am dawn raid at her Chipping Norton home this morning has deprived Brooks and her racehorse trainer husband Charlie of their annual foray to jumping racing's Blue Riband meeting.

Compensation-for-unlawful-arrest lawyer sources estimate she could get $$$ for hurt feelings if all charges are dropped for lack of proof.

Lord Leveson is 104.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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