GMP receive an eight grand CO2 charge for helping in the London Riots

Funny story written by IainB

Tuesday, 25 October 2011

image for GMP receive an eight grand CO2 charge for helping in the London Riots
GMP officers unaware their vehicles were racking up CO2 charges

Greater Manchester Police were left reeling and feeling out of pocket this week when they received an eight thousand pounds charge for crossing the emissions zone in London during the London riots.

"We were shocked," said Chief of Police, Henry Hoover. "When the riots in London were going on we got a phone call from the Met asking if we could spare any officers and vehicles."

Generously, Hoover sent fifteen cars, five vans and forty officers to help out the beleaguered capital.

"My officers put their health and well being on the line to protect the capital from these rioters," said Hoover. "A couple of them were injured, but soldiered on for the good of public order. After the riots had been quashed, they came home. They did a good job."

The vehicles that were sent down had crossed the emissions zone several times during the incursions, each time clocked by the automatic cameras. Not being on the exempt list, their licence plates were automatically generating bills.

"The bill arrived last week," said Hoover. "My transport chief was shocked. Initially, he rang the London Mayor's office and asked for it to be rectified only to be told that once it was in the system, there was nothing they could do and we had to pay it."

Hoover rang Boris Johnson himself.

"The man is a complete buffoon," said Hoover. "Aside from that, I got the feeling that he is there to draw attention away from the people who really run the mayor's office."

The upshot of the conversation saw Johnson agree that on this occasion the bill would be wiped away.

"I thought that was that," said Hoover. "Until I got a final demand this morning."

According to Hoover, the GMP have five days to settle the bill or face having their vehicles impounded.

"I'd like to see them try," said Hoover. "If they send their recovery vehicles up here to get my cars, I'm going to have them all clamped. They can pay eight grand to have them unclamped. There'll be nothing I can do 'once they're in the system'."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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