A 27 year old woman has been forced to give up Rumbacize after contracting ammonia poisoning from the smell of piss in the air at classes and becoming middle aged. “Of course I’d seen the Tena Lady adverts,” Clitora Flange said. “I just didn’t th…
A sunny afternoon spent on a gentle bike ride in the countryside turned to shit for a man on Thursday, after the bicycle he was riding got a puncture in the back tyre. The incident took place on a long stretch of road between Tapon commune and Bat…
In keeping with medical advice that everyone should take regular exercise, and taking advantage of the opportunity that the Coronavirus lockdown has provided him with, one man in his 'twilight years' has decided to 'get with the program', and to star…
This week, Prime Minister Boris Johnson was photographed doing a press-up to show how fit and healthy he is, despite his appearance. The PM's personal trainer, Geoff Ym, revealed exclusively to The Spoof the entire exercise regime he puts the PM thro...
It's the exercise video that nobody thought would get released. Before he died, Joy Division's lead singer Ian Curtis recorded a thirty-minute exercise routine compiled from live performances where he shows how he keeps in shape. Entitled "Ian Cur...
Discontented with life as usual, Bertram Harvest of Nashville, Tennessee, did a total about-face, followed by another, ending up in precisely where he had started. “What goes around comes around,” said Harvest. “In this case, it was me.” Accord...
"Are you fit for the Cross?" is the motto of the new fitness program known as Christian CrossFit, which largely entails hauling a six-foot-tall wooden cross up a hill in high heat. "You get a real workout, and you also get to appreciate the sacrif...
Desperate to combat rising rates of chronic disease in an increasingly sedentary indoor culture, the Food and Drug Administration has officially classified 'going outside and remaining there for at least 30 seconds' as exercise. "It's something th...
"I knew I wasn't in the greatest shape," said Justin Toler of Nashville, Tennessee, "but meditation is just sitting there. I thought I could handle that okay." Unfortunately, that proved not to be the case. According to Toler, he arrived at Breath...
A woman has astonished her tutors after enrolling on a course to become a Personal Trainer and passing it with flying colors just six months later - all without the benefit of hands! The woman, about whom very little is known, appears in an online...
Desperate to counter skyrocketing rates of mental illness and plummeting rates of physical activity, the Food and Drug Association has officially classified anxiety as exercise. "It really does get the heart rate up at times," said FDA Commissione...
Desperate to boost exercise rates, the Food and Drug Administration capitalized on the soaring popularity of electric scooters as an alternative means of transportation and formally classified riding the scooters as exercise that will count toward th...
After being forced to undergo bypass surgery to address his advanced heart disease, 48-year-old Christian Casey of Nashville, Tennessee, decided it was time to make some real changes to his diet, including switching from drinking Sprite to Canada Dry...
According to the latest research, skipping should no longer be considered the exclusive purview of children; it offers substantial health benefits for adults as well - and not only that, can be a terrific mood-booster. "Grownups who've been holdin...
While less than 25 percent of Americans are getting the recommended amount of most forms of exercise, exercise rates are no less than skyrocketing in one particular area: futility. Kent Bellow, CEO of pharmaceutical giant Smerck & Co., applaud...
A TV advertisement for a 'Nordic Walking' exercise machine involving several supremely fit-looking individuals whose healthy, energetic and confident demeanor resembled that of some sort of 'Master Race', has attracted the attention of a man in Tapon...
With the New Year and its associated array of resolutions fast approaching, the Food and Drug Administration has urged Americans contemplating losing weight and getting in shape to keep their health and fitness goals aspirational. “People have the...
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