Harbinger of Doom eyes Ascot's King George

Funny story written by queen mudder

Friday, 23 July 2010

image for Harbinger of Doom eyes Ascot's King George
Harbinger - seen here on the right blinkered and muzzled - may topple arch rivals tomorrow

Ascot - (Portents): It's the numerology of Sunday's 19.37GMT lunar ingress into the sign of Aquarius that's freaking out the punters.

Online spreadbetting site Aintgottaprayer.con has reported a Chinese wall of money on 9/4 second favorite Harbinger to eclipse the King George and Queen Elizabeth Stakes aspirations of two 2010 Derby winners.

The Group One race is named after the British monarch and his spouse who ascended to the Throne in 1937 following the abdication of King Edward VIII.

Previously the equine contest had been called the King George & Queen Elizabeth Diamond Stakes prior to a downgrading that renamed it the Cubic Zirconia.

Nowadays all reference to bling has been removed from the official nomenclature in deference to Austerity Britain climate change.

Tomorrow the one million pounds in prize money will see both the Epsom Derby victor Workforce and Irish Derby champion Cape Blanco line up for the Ascot racecourse feature.

Awesome French champion jockey Olivier Peslier take the Harbinger of Doom ride for trainer Sir Michael Stout and owners Highclere.

The twelve furlong race could be a cakewalk for the Gallic superstar who rides all of Stout's top-rated in preference to retained stable jockey Ryan Moore.

Monday's full moon is accompanied by a brilliant Sun/Jupiter trine and baleful oppositions between Mercury and Neptune and Uranus and Saturn.

Frankie Dettori is 4ft 11ins.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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