World Cruiserweight Champion Penis McFlypaper retained his crown last night here in Bangkok in controversial circumstances after KO-ing Welsh challenger Blethyn 'Brickhead' O'Jones in Round 5.
It looked good for Penis McFlypaper as he made a spectacular ring entrance wearing a gown donated by Stella McCartney and flanked by a bevy of Thai ladyboys. The Swansea boy's entrance was far less dramatic as he entered the ring wearing a robe made of old sackcloth, hitting himself feverishly in the face with an Accrington brick and howling at the timekeeper in pidgin English.
Penis McFlypaper's trainer, Aaron Gymslipper admitted that the opening round took him by surprise as the challenger, Blethyn 'Brickhead' O'Jones stalked across the ring towards the champion in a low crouch launching a furious flurry of hooks, crosses, uppercuts and candelabras which had the champion reeling and rocking as he found himself trapped on the ropes.
The bell sounding the end of the round must have come as a relief to Penis McFlypaper, who slumped down heavily onto his stool while his cornerman worked on him by forcing him to drink two cold beers and singing 'Eye Of The Tiger' in a loud falsetto.
Blethyn 'Brickhead' O'Jones declined the opportunity to rest between rounds, preferring to taunt his opponent by standing in the centre of the ring performing Billy Elliot style ballet routines.
Round four brought a warning and a point deducted for the Welshman when he hauled Penis McFlypaper to the canvas and sat on his head, refusing to budge.
A furious Penis McFlypaper berated the referee and had a couple more beers in the time-out while Blethyn 'Brickhead' O'Jones got involved in an extra curricular altercation with one of Penis McFlypaper's ladyboys.
At the resumption, Blethyn 'Brickhead' O'Jones resumed his assault with even greater gusto, offloading a series of piano punches to Penis McFlypapers head and groin area.
The controversy really kicked off in Round 5, when in sheer desperation, Aaron Gymslipper threw the galvanised steel corner spit bucket into the ring. Penis McFlypaper grabbed the spit bucket and jammed it over Blethyn 'Brickhead' O'Jones's head. The challenger, clearly disorientated was unable to defend himself when Penis McFlypaper hit his bucket head with the corner stool.
The referee saw no breach of the rules and regulations and counted the Swansea man out.
Blethyn 'Brickhead O'Jones plans to appeal against the decision and hopes for a rematch.
Look out for the sparks.
