Orlando, Fla - (Fore! Play) Fallen golfing giant Tiger Woods has taken up playing pocket billiards according to neighbors who saw him fumbling around in the dark.
The 33 year-old champion putter is said to have tossed aside any idea of a golfing comeback pending a tricky matrimonial situation.
Offers of immediate stress relief from dozens of Orlando babes were politely rejected as Tiger continued to wear an electronic ankle bracelet imposed by his estranged wife Elin.
"Mr Woods has agreed to the tagging as a condition of ongoing marriage guidance therapy," Isleworth resident Dave Chong explained.
"Apparently it's digitally connected to a monitor on Elin's handheld remote control.
"The slightest tremor or vibration outside the designated Woods compound results in an immediate electric shock being administered.
"Kinda pavlovian? Uh, yeah."
