Is 'orgasmic handshake' hypnotherapist behind Tiger Woods' philandering?

Funny story written by queen mudder

Friday, 18 December 2009

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Joslyn James' boobs have always been a right handful the porn star said today

Orlando, Fla - (Putters): TV hypnotist Tom Silver distanced himself today from reports that he taught Tiger Woods stage tricks that mesmerise women into thinking they have had an orgasm when they shake a man's hand.

The move follows claims by several of the golf champ's lovers that sheer animal magnetism forces were transmitted by Tiger's hands and body during first contact.

Silver, 69, once put a woman under a hypnotic trance on the Ricki Lake Show and ordered her to have an orgasm every time she shook hands with a man.

Some of the show's audience 'freaked out' after witnessing the woman's ecstatic performance as she proceeded to shake male members' hands.

Porn star Joslyn James told reporters today she very much doubted Silver's claims and that Woods "probably inherited the freaky congenital condition" from his DNA father Bill Clinton.

Rachel Uchitel is naturally multiple-orgasmic.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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