Usain Bolt Discovered To Be Hermaphrodite

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 19 September 2009

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Sir Usain Bolt

There was a shock in the world of athletics today, when it was announced that Jamaican Olympic 100m and 200m sprint champion, Sir Usain Bolt, was a hermaphrodite.

A hermaphrodite is a person whose genetic make-up has been jumbled so that they do not know whether they are a woman or a man, and, consequently, do not know which toilets to go into when caught short in a shopping mall.

Bolt won the aforementioned Men's events in the 2008 Beijing Olympics, posting new world record times in both, but this latest announcement may mean that the records may have to be scrapped, and that he/she has to hand back his/her gold medals.

Depending on the outcome of a gender test organised for next week, he may be forced to run in Women's events in the future.

Other notable celebrities to 'come out' this week include former Grandstand host, Des Lynam, former Monty Python star, John Cleese, Liverpool striker, Fernando Torres and TV presenter Graham Norton, in a pathetic attempt to rid himself of his 'homo' tag.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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