In developing news, the English cricket team, preparing to play Australia in the Fourth Ashes Test at Headingley, Leeds, has been kidnapped by Somali pirates who were touring the UK on a summer break from their desperado ways.
Reports suggest that the English players' bus was stopped by a cabal of Somalians enroute to their hotel room after a morning training session. The pirates boarded the bus and held a kalashnikov rifle to the driver's head and demanded he take the players to Leeds Airport. From here threats were issued and a suitably fuelled aeroplane was brought to the apron where the bus's contents were awaiting.
With the departing plane cleared for takeoff, Police were summoned however arrived, typically, too late to do anything to save the Ashes squad.
Fourteen hours later the plane arrived in Mogadishu, the Somalian capital.
The players were then transferred to a unknown destination (rumours persist that the Somalians themselves wanted to play the English in a five day cricket contest).
NB the bus driver has sent a secret text message saying that Somalia are 1 for 224 in reply to England's first innings score of all out for 38.
