F1: Red Bull Racing in Banned Substance Probe

Funny story written by Dungeekin

Tuesday, 21 April 2009

Following their stunning 1-2 victory in the Chinese Grand Prix last weekend, the Red Bull F1 team are to be investigated over allegations that they used a performance-enhancing substance.

Red Bull's Sebastian Vettel won the rain-soaked race, with Mark Webber second. However, the result has been contested (again) by Ferrari. The investigation centres around the accusation that the team were using an unauthorised additive which provided additional downforce during the Grand Prix.

Team Principal of Red Bull racing, Christian Horner, dismissed Ferrari's complaint, pointing out that they will complain about almost anything all the time they're not winning. However, he did acknowledge that Red Bull were using a fuel additive, though he claimed it was within the regulations to do so.

Mr Horner said, "we have found that using a small percentage of Red Bull in the fuel tank at pit stops causes the carbon-fibre rear spoiler and diffuser to expand at speed. This effect gives the car approximately 5% more downforce, and on a full-speed flying lap this can equate to as much as half a second off the lap time.

"We have discovered, therefore, that Red Bull does give you wing".

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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