In an event unsurpassed since the moon landings, the recent England victory over Croatia was exposed as an elaborate hoax.
Scientists including renowned physicist Professor Hugh Jarse were involved in a form of mass hypnosis not seen since the sixties.
"It was a difficult feat to pull off" said Profesor Jarse "however by utilising the fact that the game was broadcast on Setanta Sports meant only 37 people watched the game making the level of subterfuge required much less."
The FA officially denied that there was any such activity but an insider said "There is no way that anyone would believe a 4-1 result, it's quite unbelievable."
More doubt was placed on the game when alleged 'hat trick hero' Theo Walcott was seen in a business studies class at City and Islington college that evening.
Professor Hugh Jarse went on to say "Anyway the world ended this morning, so anything that happened since then is some sort of residual memory caused by a temporal rift in the space time continuum."