Gary Neville was today arrested and charged with a chain of robberies in the local area. A total of 5 newsagents where hit during a period of three weeks by a man wearing a mask in the shape of a bottom.
The robber, nicknamed "The.B.u.m.Bandit", had terrorised the area stealing milk, newspapers and two copys of Gary Nevilles autobiography "Gary: The man, the moustache".
Gary "The.B.u.m.Bandit" Nevilles cunning diguise proved to be his downfall after police released an advert in a attempt to catch the robbery saying "A man hobbling in his early 30's with a face like a backside". Gary was arrested within 30 minutes of the advert airing on the local news.
The have a go hero, 52, responsible had this to say: "When the description was released I thought of Gary straight away. I didn't want to hand him over, having been a Utd fan all my life, since 1992. But I knew I had to do the decent thing."
Gary "The.B.u.m.Bandit" has been put on gardening leave by Utd while the trial takes place. A Utd spokes person had this to say "Gary will be able to tend to his beloved gardens at his home in Bell E.n.d. He loves his gardening so he should remain in decent shape and with his garden being on a hill it makes it extra hard work. We hope that once the trial is over all this uphill gardening will have helped Gary maintain his fitness levels and he can put these Bum.Bandit accusations behind him".
