Written by Lord B of W

Tuesday, 18 March 2008

image for Erotic goal celebrations draw crowds to Women's football
Sadly, our photographer was facing the wrong way at the time.

Women's football has never been so popular, with both FA Cup semi-finals played at Wembley in front of capacity crowds.

Kelly Smith and Lianne Sanderson hit two goals apiece as holders Arsenal ran up a comfortable 5-1 victory over Northern Division side Lincoln City.

But it was a different story in the other semi-final, with Leeds beating Everton 5-4 on penalties.

Explaining the sudden popularity, Kelly Smith said "Ever since we realised that we could attract bigger crowds with x-rated goal celebrations, the women's game has gone from strength to strength. For the first of my two goals in this game I simply lifted my shirt over my head, revealing my firm, perky breasts, and for my second goal I made out with strike partner and lesbian lover Lianne, right in front of our supporters."

She added, "I realise that some women's rights groups are appalled, and that our traditional young female supporters no longer come to the games, but playing in front of 80,000 men is quite exciting. The weird thing though, is that there is no clapping when we score as most of the supporters have one hand down their pants!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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