Life Without Welker Muddles On for the Patriots

Funny story written by Ossurworld

Friday, 15 March 2013

Now that Wes Welker won't be carrying Tom Brady next season, we may be looking at the biggest disaster since the sinking of the Titanic.

For six years Tom Brady has been on the downslide. Time after time he could not find any other receivers. He would throw passes into the ground, over the head, between the numbers of players who could not handle his errant throws.

So, every third pass of his game was to Wes Welker. Only in notable circumstances did Welker drop the ball. Most of the time he caught the circus style "Hail Marys" of the franchise QB.

We may be well within our rights to fear the world of the Patriots without Wes Welker.

What will Bill Belichick do now that he no longer has Wes Welker to kick around? The man in the gray hoodie used to cut down players like Ty Law, Richard Seymour, and Asante Samuel with his scythe, but the best fun Belichick ever had was his regular chess games with Wes.

Night after night Wes Welker showed up at Belichick's office and demanded another game of chess. The only way for Welker to keep his job was to hold Belichick at bay on the chessboard.

Welker might castle his way to success for six seasons, but his Queen, Tom Brady, was busy building a real castle in Brentwood, California, for the day when Belichick cried out, "Checkmate."

However, as this season ended, Wes regained his full head of hair, but lost his knight protector when Tom Brady took less money and did not guarantee Welker's contract.

We never realized the seventh seal was on Welker's deal with the Patriots and Beelzebub Belichick.

We do know that Brady has promised Welker a job as Gatekeeper of the Moat when football days are over. What are friends for?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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