Time To Fire Bill Belichick?

Funny story written by Ossurworld

Thursday, 14 March 2013

Bill Belichick hates Wes Welker.

You cannot deny it, Bill. The calculated plot to rid himself of a star who did not meet the cookie cutter mold that Belichick has created for his winning teams.

Welker had a public sense of humor. It turns out to be gallows humor because it has led Welker out of town, personally tarred and feathered with the worst offer ever made to a NFL receiver.

Leading the league all-time in catches from the all-star Tom Brady is no mean feat. Apparently, Coach Belichick thinks Tom can make anyone a star slot receiver.

Belichick is playing the slots with the fans' quarter-when two bits won't buy team loyalty.

You may have noticed that "won't" contains "won," which is past tense, Mr. Belichick. Shall you continue to win after dispatching your hard-playing star?

The legend that all NFL players will kill (or at least take a smaller paycheck) to play for the vaunted Belichick Genius may now be put to rest.

If your reputation starts to precede you, like a stench of death, it may be that necrosis is at the heart of your future.

If Bill Belichick wants to look fashionable on the sidelines of every game, perhaps he should pick up the ultimate hood with its scythe. Belichick has become the Patriot Grim Reaper, sending players to their fates without mercy.

A few players like Tom Brady will play chess with Belichick every night to extend his future another season, but Igmar Bergman's Seventh Seal teaches us that the Grim Reaper isn't to be trusted.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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