Written by Dr. Billingsgate

Tuesday, 5 June 2012

image for Former NBA Star Called For Double-Dribbling Wife Off 30th Floor Balcony

BILLINGSGATE POST - Alfreedo World-Atwar, former New York Knicks sixth-man, told police he inadvertently dribbled his wife off his high-rise apartment balcony during a playful game of one-on-one basketball this Memorial Day in Camden, New Jersey.

Since retiring, World-Atwar has been arrested three times for what he describes as, "playful mayhem." Noticeably chagrined because of his inability to palm his wife's head as he dribbled her out of the bedroom door leading to the balcony, he said that he lost control of her while doing a cross-over dribble. Alfreedo told the investigating officers that "she bounced over the railing without even ripping the net of her panty hosed butt...swish!"

The distraught mother of the deceased was overheard telling Alicia's natty-headed sister that if she marries a professional basketball player, to make sure his hands are large enough to palm her head while doing a cross-over. A memorial service is planned later this week. Alfreedo hopes it will not interfere with the televised Boston Celtics-Miami Heat playoff game he plans to watch.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: NBA

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