Bobby Valentine Meets Wrath of Media Titans

Funny story written by Ossurworld

Saturday, 7 April 2012

With the Boston Red Sox opening day, Bobby Valentine was relegated to the doghouse as the pennant waving star of the day.

Alas, the pennant seems to be residing in Detroit, and Bobby V is merely an interloper, a wannnabe, and loser of the day. He's losing steam fast with the media.

It's no surprise when the media want Bobby V's head on Pesky Pole, not a pennant.

If Opening Day of 2012 had a downside, it was hardly that the team lost. Good teams have lost the first game by worse ways for decades.

No, what happened on this year's first game day was typical of half major league teams and Boston press. Once again, the press pulled a lever on Valentine. They dropped a dime and called the fans.

Fans usually bite on whatever bait the media puts on the hook. This season, the worm is Bobby V-and the fish are biting.

Yes, Boston's victories have ten thousand fathers-and Boston's losses have a million case managers.

You do not need a microscope to see micromanaging on every level at every twist and turn. Bobby V has now seen the problem in Boston: it is the media.

After one game, the juggernaut of Internet providers has grown flush with critiques and inquests.

Everyone's not only got an opinion and a nose, but the forums for spewing forth pique, flak, raving, dope-slaps, zaps and pans are legion.

The media moguls have not come to the game to praise Bobby V, but to bury him.

Perhaps it takes only one bite into the poison apple of the evil queen to tell you it's over. The sting of the Boston media tops the Death of a Thousand Cuts that was the highlight of capital punishment in Imperial China.

Welcome to Boston, Mr. Valentine. In the words of Karen Carpenter, they've only just begun.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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