Denver Broncos Quarterback Tim Tebow Is Recommended By 9 Out of 10 Ministers

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 15 December 2011

image for Denver Broncos Quarterback Tim Tebow Is Recommended By 9 Out of 10 Ministers
An NFL football autographed by Tim Tebow is worth 100 times more than one autographed by Ndamukong Suh.

DENVER - Lately it seems that we are seeing more and more NFL games where certain players seem to think that they can simply violate established rules and regulations and get away with it.

NFL fans have seen the likes of dirty players such as Ndamukong Suh of the Detroit Lions and James Harrison of the Pittsburgh Steelers carry on in a totally unsportsmanlike and unacceptable manner and falsely believing that they do not have to play by the NFL guidelines.

Three weeks ago Suh actually bit the helmet, yes the helmet, of an opposing quarterback. And the following week he reportedly began angrily chewing on a football, as he stood on the sidelines, and actually started eating it until the special teams coach and two stadium security guards managed to wrestle the pigskin from his mouth.

Harrison is probably best noted for pouring a bottle of Tabasco sauce in his underwear on game days to help get him all fired up. He is also the player who once got so mad at a referee's call that he took away his whistle and swallowed it.

The coaches and owners have to meet with these out-of-control individuals in some nice quiet office and remind these rules violating troublemakers that they play for the NFL and that it is both an honor and a privilege to do so.

These players who believe that they can carry on like gridiron bullies and get away with it have to be reminded that they get paid millions and millions of dollars to play for a professional sports team; and the keyword is professional.

It needs to be drilled into their petrified rock heads that they are professional football players playing for the NFL and that they are not wrestlers in some professional wrestling federation.

Most normal individuals [i.e. players] do get it. They do understand that there is a certain manner in which they are supposed to conduct themselves on and off the field. And most players unlike Ndamukong Suh do not believe that leaving teeth marks on the goal post is accepted behavior.

Yes, it is no secret that during the course of a heated game some players will get out of line and commit rules violations, but they have to also know that they will pay for their illegal actions with suspensions and hefty fines.

And if players continue to ignore established rules and regulations then it will surely result in more injuries. And even the youngest NFL fan knows that as big and as strong as NFL football players are any one of them could very easily hurt any other one quite seriously without very little effort.

But that is not the point. For one thing it goes against established rules. For another thing it is unfair to the fans who actually pay the exorbitant salaries of these players by dishing out $17 for a damn hot dog, $19 for a hot beer, and $175 for some crack cocaine.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Abel was just kidding. Everyone knows that there are no drugs in football.]

And if NFL teams start losing their quarterbacks and other star players due to the cowardly acts of football bullies than the fans will not get to see the stars and superstars that they paid their hard-earned money to see.

And the game will be hurt because NFL football games will be played with second and third string quarterbacks with names like Bibby Fishfellow, Gideon Joey Poofenpix, and Hirohito Takatictac.

Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow is a perfect example of a player who plays hard, who plays to win, and who plays by the rules. You never see him badmouth anyone or engage in trash talk.

Tim Tebow is the epitome of the NFL player who plays the game the way it was meant to be played; with love, with passion, and with adherence to the guidelines that have been established.

Tebow is such a good person that he could even play the game while wearing a white shirt and tie.

There are many fans and some players who criticize him simply because of who he is. He is a remarkable individual who gives praise to the Lord and who knows that his talent comes from above.

The latest football phenomena which has captured the sports world by storm is known as "Tebowing," which is getting down on one knee to pray, even if everyone else around you is doing something completely different.

One thing about the Denver quarterback is that you will never see him celebrate in a way that will disrespect or insult opposing players or teams.

You will also never see Tim grab a cheerleader after a making a rushing touchdown and kiss her right on the lips in front of millions of fans like other players do.

Tim Tebow has one thing that players like Ndamukong Suh and James Harrison do not have and probably will never ever have; and that is class with a capital C.

And that is precisely why Tim Tebow is a type of individual that a lot of parents would love for their sons and daughters to grow up emulating.

So is it really any wonder that Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow is recommended by nine out of 10 ministers?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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