Carlos Tevez Exclusive - "I Will Never Play For Manchester City Again...Ever"

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Thursday, 29 September 2011

image for Carlos Tevez Exclusive - "I Will Never Play For Manchester City Again...Ever"
Corner! And Tevez Will Take It!

Carlos Tevez revealed exclusively to Skoob Sports News today, that he will never again play for Manchester City, and speaking through an interpreter he revealed exactly why.

The Argentinian maestro claims that he was misinterpreted at the Allianz Arena in Munich, and denied that he had refused to play, saying that he was pleading with City boss Mancini to let him get out on the park and put it about a bit.

"The problem was that Carlos wanted to play wearing wellies," the interpreter revealed. "He's very passionate about wellies is Carlos. He used to play in Dunlop wellies in the back streets of Buenos Aries as a kid, and he wanted to wear a pair in the Allianz Arena, as a sort of tribute to kids who play the beautiful game in wellies up seedy back alleys."

The interpreter went on to explain that Mancini absolutely forbade Tevez to play in wellies, insisting that the diminutive Argie wear proper football boots, in keeping with the Manchester City 'brand.'

Apparently Sheikh Mansoor thinks wellies are 'a bit shit' and that they don't fit the profile of a Premier League club with European ambitions. He allegedly told a confidante: "I don't pay £50 million for a top player to pissball about in wellies."

In closing, and again speaking through the same interpreter, Tevez revealed:

"The manager and the club have a big problem with wellies. It's as if they've become too big and grand and have completely ignored the game at grass roots level, where wellies remain hugely popular. George Best, Pele, Maradona, Geoff Hurst - they've all played in wellies. If Manchester City stick to their guns and refuse to let me play in wellies, I shall never pull on the famous sky blue jersey again. I shall probably have a quiet word with Mister Joorabchian and go to Real Madrid, or Corinthians to ply my trade. Or perhaps even Liverpool. That would be dead good that. They could put posters up of me in a Liverpool shirt at Lime Street station, saying 'Welcome To Liverpool!' Yes, that would be rather cool."

It has since occurred to SSN that the interpreter may have been taking the piss, but we can't swear to it.

More as we get it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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