There were 21 spoof news snippets published in March 2019. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get all the news snippets from a day in this month.
BREAKING NEWS
Trump says Attila the Hun assured him he had no idea there was a massacre(s).
written by Matt Birkenhauer, 01 March 2019
Paul Merson proves ex-footy players are morons!
Merson, Ince, Sutton, Scholes, Neville, etc, you name them, we shame them! Their in-depth bullshit knowledge of footy is CRAP, clouded in boozy-notions! My flea-bitten dog could predict games better!
written by unknown
Ole's Offspring!!
First there were the Busby Babes, then Fergie's Fledglings, now the greatest club in the world has OLE'S OFFSPRING!!
A NORWEGIAN WOULD!
written by unknown
Ocasio-Cortez Leads Fight in the House to Abolish Executive Branch
Manwhile, Eric Trump says his dad is looking into passing more prison reform bills, "just in case."
written by Al N., 09 March 2019
Latest Innovation in Dodgy Congressional Representation
Congresswoman IIan Omar actually fronts for Council on American Islamic Relations - a group supporting Hamas and Hezbollah terrorists. Such a role would surely have been approved by Benedict Arnold!
written by Trinculoman, 09 March 2019
Yet Another Honor for Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
Latest Fete for AOC was given by the Frederich Engels Society for the Perpetuation of Addled and Clueless Collectivist Ideology. Presenting the award, most aptly, was addled and clueless Chelsea Manning.
written by Trinculoman, 09 March 2019
Hillary Clinton To Sue Donald Trump
Hillary Clinton plans to sue Donald Trump for calling her Crooked Hillary over half a million times. She's looking forward to winning and retiring at Mar-A-Lago.
written by K.C. Bell, 09 March 2019
Obama is Deported to Kenya
"I don't know anything about it" said Trump. "Everyone knows I never interfere with immigration."
written by Al N., 10 March 2019
R Kelly worried about getting the electric chair
He believes he could fry.
written by Sir Geoffroy Cockface, 13 March 2019
Beto's Deep Regret Will Lead To A New Feature In His Campaign
Beto O'Rourke's "deep regret" at being a white man will most likely propel him to transform into donning 'black face' and doing a skate-board ridin', arms flappin' Bojangles routine on Iowa stops.
written by Trinculoman, 15 March 2019
Mitt Romney Needs No Special Protective Armed Squad
As evidenced by his vote denying a national emergency at the Border, Romney walks around impervious to attack from would-be assaulters---the overpowering smell of skunk is truly effective.
written by Trinculoman, 15 March 2019
Michael Jackson Breaks Silence
Local psychic claims exclusive rights as Mr. Jackson's conduit.
written by Michael Sienicki, 15 March 2019
A Familiar Face Appears To Be a Primary Challenger To Ilan Omar
It's no other than Ex-Senator Al Franken. "I'm only finding myself" Al has been caught on CCTV in drag and a turban in Omar's district attending the Berlitz Somalian school. A Trannie political redux?
written by Trinculoman, 16 March 2019
Guess Who's Mueller's Next Target? It's Beto!
Mueller's "skunk works" cyber guys trolled the Black Net and uncovered it was 'Hacker' Beto who got all the DNC and Hillary emails. So, Beto's next gig will not be a primary run but as Russian mole.
written by Trinculoman, 19 March 2019
Trump Gives Fox Network Official Orders to Stop Harassing Tucker and Judge Jeanine
FoxTV has Fox & Friends make the official reply and they promise Trump they'll do better next time.
written by Al N., 19 March 2019
Attorney General Barr Just Appointed Another Independent Counsel
Judge Janine Piro has accepted an appointment as Independent Counsel for Kicking Ass on All DOJ Embedded, Trump-Deranged, Arrogant, Self-Entitled, Coup d'etat -Pledged, Deep State Socialist Progressives.
written by Trinculoman, 20 March 2019
Labels
Politician labels himself as politician who doesn’t like labels.
written by Matt Birkenhauer, 21 March 2019
Trump Claims That He Has Lost the Mueller Report
...And that means that they'll have to do the whole thing over.
written by Al N., 24 March 2019
Maybe You Can Indict Trump
Maybe a president can’t be indicted, but Trump’s crimes of collusion with Russia happened before he became president.
written by K.C. Bell, 26 March 2019
Jussie Smollett Nominated for Premier False Narrative Fabricator of the Year
The Ptolemaic Flat Earth Society confirmed citing Smollett for its annual award. However, competition will be fierce: AOC, John Brennan, Adam Schiff, Beto O'Rourke, and Kamala Harris are also favored,
written by Trinculoman, 27 March 2019
"Pencil-Neck" Congressman Schiff Reveals the Latest Plot of Russian "Collusion"
Pencil-necked & paper-brained Adam Schiff is undeterred in his quest for "collusion." He now claims that Russian babushka dolls are plotting to replace U.S.A. "bobble-head" trinkets, such as himself.
written by Trinculoman, 29 March 2019
