Jaquie Smith guest on Sky News Press Preview
I imagine her husband was sitting at home watching a 'DVD'. Just this time, not on expenses...
BBC announce Christmas schedule.
There are definitely no Jimmy Savile tribute programmes this year. The Director General has learnt his lesson.
They Think Its All Over!
Statistics says the UK is finally out of recession after a 1% growth in GDP over the last 3 months.
David Cameron today ordered everyone to have a street party - with no red tape, but lots of bunting
More Jimmy Savile allegations revealed!
Fellow Radio DJ says Savile was into necrophilia.
And another unnamed source says Savile once had sex with Donald Trumps toupée.
Audrey Harrison decides not to quit boxing
"83 seconds of work every few months? Whats not to like!"
Obama becomes first President in history to vote in advance of election day
Well at least SOMEONES made their mind up!
Greek football team sponsored by brothels
If they're playing really bad, they get pulled off at half-time.
Inseine's BOOK OF THE DAY 151
"Are You a Liar?,"
Government to Ban Import of Ashtrays
As from Monday, the UK government will be banning the import of ash trays.
Ajax clean as a whistle; City shitty as a bunch of scrubbers!
Ajax mopped the floor with shitty City and now United fans can have a long, clean laugh at their dirty neighbours!
written by Jaggedone, 25 October 2012
Student auctions virginity for £500k
I missed that one on ebay. Was postage included in the price?
Brazilian student sells her virginity for $780,000
I'm holding out for a million.
Brazilian student auctions her virginity for $780,000
Looks like the economy is not the only thing going UP!
UK moves out of recession!
Its true, GDP has risen 1% in the three months from July to September.
The government are now planning to host the Olympics every three months instead of every sixty years.
Team GB Bronze medals stolen from nightclub
Police investigating the theft of two Team GB Olympic bronze Medals have made an arrest.
A spokesman for Lance Armstrong has denied any involvement.
Bad Headline: Number 119
MILK DRINKERS TURN TO POWDER
Infinite number of cats writing Shakespeare?
Research has shown that no matter how many cats are given computers, they refuse to write the works of Shakespeare. "They never use the keyboard," said a researcher, "they just play with the mouse."
written by IainB, 25 October 2012
Farty Owls: 2?
Be patriotic they tell you...then allow Admiralty Arch to be sold off to a Spanish billionaire who intends to turn it into a feckin' hotel....you could not make it up!!
written by Herrdoktorfox, 25 October 2012
Prince and the hound
"Get the freakin' thing off!!" cried HRH Prince of Wales, Prince Charles, as a large Danish hound, belonging to an onlooker bit the Royal on his backside (or bottom,ass etc)while he was out visiting.
written by whatinthe world, 25 October 2012
Why Libyan Embassy Terrorist Attack Ignored
The USA has the greatest intelligence gathering & communication assets on the planet. However, we also have an incompetent receiver in the White House, corrupted by politically correct liberal noise!
Schieffer Resolution Passes
The 193 nations of the UN General Assembly voted unanimously to blame all the world's problems on "Obama bin Laden!"
"The Things I say, I mean"
LONE RANGER: President Barack Obama said on February 2, 2009 he will only serve one term if the economy isn't fixed. TONTO: The US economy is still broke; therefore he spoke with forked tongue!
A Debatable Issue
President Obama indicated the USA doesn't rely on horse effluvia anymore. He was corrected by political advisor Axelrod and DNC Chair Wasserman as to what Democratic Party positions are made from!
Republican Candidates Defeat Themselves
Democratic SML Reid is smiling. Republican Senatorial candidates in Missouri and Indiana are shooting themselves in the foot by shooting off their mouths about rape not justifying an abortion!
President Obama coming from Chicago IL has no clue as to how many US Navy ships are at sea, transiting or in port at any given time. He also thinks bayonet is a city in New Jersey!
Another Vast Right Wing Conspiracy
Democratic left wing liberals are charging that right wing groups are dumping saltpeter into reservoirs located in blue states to prevent liberals from reproducing!
The Third Presidential Debate
Americans have sent the White House cleaning bills for shampooing the carpet in front of their high definition TVs caused by the warmed over bullshit generated by President Obama!
Obama's Energy Independence Folly
Pres. Obama has placed a moratorium on US offshore oil/gas drilling, evoked EPA coal rules that are decimating the US coal industry, trying to stop natural gas fracking & is ignoring nuclear power!
Romney Prepares for an Electoral College Tie
A 269 Electoral vote tie could lead to Republican President Romney and Democratic VP Biden. President Romney plans to convert the defunct White House fallout shelter to a rubber room for the VP!