Lib-Dem supporters support Clegg!
A mass meeting of Lib-Dem supporters in the Old Cow snug bar in Nottingham, voted to offer their support for Mr Clegg as leader of their party.
It was a 100% vote in favour - both members voted.
written by Inchcock, 04 July 2011
Scientists reveal the one word which is always spelled wrong in the dictionary
It's "wrong".
written by unknown
Rooney's Scab sold on eBay
Rooney's scab sold on eBay for twenty-five quid. Buyer, Jim McDonald of 25 Booth Street, Middlesbrough, wishes to remain anonymous.
written by unknown
Tour de France shocker
Someone's flattened all the mountains on the Tour de France route. Polka Dot jersey chasers in shock. Some say they may have to drop out of the Tour. Mark Cavendish is grinning from ear to ear.
written by unknown
Man Beaten Up Outside Kebab Shop Demands Rematch.
A man who got seen to outside a fast food joint has demanded a rematch. He told his friends that he had a slightly painful foot and wasn't at his best. Apparently, he will crucify the bloke next time.
written by Dr Jon, 04 July 2011
Pamela Anderson's boobs and bum are those of a 22 year old, she's 44!
Pamela Anderson has launched her sexy undie collection and modelled them herself. The silicone still looks fine, the botox hasn't worn off in fact her bum and boobs look like those of a 22 year old!
written by unknown
Speaker Steps In
Speaker Bercow has resisted efforts to bring Ministers to the Commons about misleading everyone about housing benefits policies. They knew Homelessness was solved by Parliament becoming a free hotel.
written by j.w., 04 July 2011
Man sues video shop for misleading DVD titles
Mr Harry Monk said; "I took the DVD home with a box of tissues and found to my absolute horror that it was just about a whale escaping back to the wild".
written by Les Being, 04 July 2011
Supermarket name loaf of bread after Wayne Rooney
I saw it today whilst out shopping. I couldn't believe it. I put my glasses on and took a second look. I was wrong; it said "Thick Cut". Simple enough mistake
written by Les Being, 04 July 2011
Arnold Schwarzenegger divorce to be televised
Insiders say, This could be his most expensive role ever
written by Les Being, 04 July 2011
The Apartment Had A Funny Smell To It
Police in Sarasota, Florida were called when neighbors reported a funny smell coming from one of the apartments. Police investigated and found the apartment was being rented by three circus clowns.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
The Dogs of Beverly Hills Are A Much More "Laid Back" Type of Pooch
A private investigator stated that the use of marijuana by dogs in Beverly Hills has really gotten out of hand. He said that's the reason sales of Kibbles 'N Pizza Bits have gone through the roof.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
America's First Insurance Policy
The first insurance policy in America was sold to a Mr. Ty P. Bixx of Cheyenne, Wyoming, who in 1862 took out a $900 insurance policy payable if he was injured by a female buffalo. The cost - 1 cent.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
The Women of The GOP
Michele Bachmann - Kinda like Sarah Palin but without the camouflage jock strap, the bratty kids, and the 50 or so daily "Ya knows."
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Louisville - We Have A Problem?
People in Louisville, Kentucky were puzzled when they heard that Louisville had a bat problem. They later learned that they were referring to the Louisville Slugger Baseball Bat shortage.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
The Waters Off The Coast of Mexico Are Getting Very, Very Hot!
Mexico has said that the rumors that a drug cartel is planning on hijacking an American cruise ship and taking it to China are ridiculous. They stated that cruise ships don't carry that much fuel.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Reverend Al "The Marrying Bro" Sharpton Is One Happy Rev
New York's Reverend Al Sharpton says that since New York passed the gay marriage law his phone has not stopped ringing with gays and lesbians booking him to do the honors.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Adam Lambert Addresses The Internet Rumor
Adam Lambert has denied the Internet rumor that he is using ex-Congressman Anthony Weiner's Internet photo as his computer screen-saver.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
The Celebrities Formerly Known As...
Billy Bob Thornton and Joaquin Phoenix who both let their huge egos and big mouths ruin their careers are reportedly both working as Walmart greeters in Phoenix, Arizona.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Glenn "Crybaby" Beck Is Even A Bigger Crybaby Now!
GOP talking head, Glenn Beck wants everyone to know the reason he has gone back to crying a hell of a lot is simply because he's upset that gays can now marry other gays in his ex-perfect New York.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Britain Appeals to Les Québécoises
"It doesn't matter if you do abolish the monarchy, we will still send you bald jerks and their horsefaced wives on extended visits. Sorry."
written by Dr Jon, 04 July 2011
China Opens World's Longest Sea Bridge
Engineers say we have the skills to build one here in the UK. Unfortunately we wouldn't have enough cones for opening day
written by Les Being, 04 July 2011
Maria Shriver seeks bizarre divorce settlement
She wants his cloths, his boots, his sunglasses and motor cycle
written by Les Being, 04 July 2011
Schwarzenegger wife seeks divorce
Maria Shriver wants relationship terminated. She said, He won't be back. Arnie says, Is your name Sarah Connor?
written by Les Being, 04 July 2011
When God was asked......
When God was asked if HE and HEAVEN really existed, he answered,
written by unknown
Paparazzi upset
They say their reputation is being 'smeared'.
written by unknown
Hillary Clinton Does Not Have An Intimate Sense of Humor
Hillary Clinton became very upset when she was recently asked by a fellow politician if she wanted to have his love child. Vice-President Joe Biden later apologized and told her he was just kidding.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Iowa Says "No" Kinda To Gang Signs
The state of Iowa has just issued a decree banning the use of gang signs by gang members. The proclamation clearly states that non-gang members can feel free to use gang signs whenever they wish.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Arizona Makes Changes To The Restaurant Tradition
Arizona has passed a law doing away with the typical restaurant server greeting of "Hi my name is (blank) and I'll be your server." It is being replaced by the more practical, "Okay, whatcha want?"
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Mrs. Obama Says Yes To A DNA Test
Michelle Obama has agreed to take a DNA test to prove once and for all that daughters Malia and Sasha are in fact her biological daughters.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Portugal Knows How To Save Money
Portugal recently conducted a scientific study and found that it can save up to $2 million a year by eliminating scientific studies.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Sarah "The Wilderness Rationalizer" Palin Strikes Again
PETA has named Sarah Palin as "Public Enemy Number One" due to her unbridled penchant for shooting all kinds of animals. Palin replied by saying she's never shot a moose that did not need shooting.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Dick Cheney - The Mean As Hell Fella That Nobody Likes
The Ku Klux Klan reported that they have turned down Dick Cheney's application. The grand wizard dragon reportedly remarked that Cheney is just too much of a bigot, racist, and homosapien.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Heavy Smoking and The Sound of Pitter Patter
Ever since the government reported that heavy smoking can lead to pregnancy the sale of crotch ashtrays has nearly gone up by 800 percent.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
The Big Apple Is Now A Gay Apple
Now that New York state has approved gay marriages, the Big Apple is calling itself, "San Francisco East, but without the Golden Gate Bridge, Alcatraz, and Rice-A-Roni."
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
Governor Jan "The Professor" Brewer Sticks Her Boot In Her Mouth
Arizona Governor Jan Brewer has outlawed the use of the word paparazzi within the states borders. She said that the word sounds 'illegal.'
written by Abel Rodriguez, 04 July 2011
