Ashes, Ashes we all stay on the ground
Ring around the larva
All of that palarva
Ashes,Ashes,
We all stay on the ground
written by unknown
NASA to send "Jeremy Clarkson" to ISS
NASA are currently building a robotic "Jeremy Clarkson" to go with their model "Stig" which is due to be sent to the international Space Station later this year.
written by IN SEINE, 18 April 2010
Ash Ash
Ash, ash, ashoo-oo-oo. People around the world are sneezing uncontrollably as ash from the Icelandic Volcano gets up their noses. People are unable to function normally as they can't stop sneezing.
written by unknown
I walked on water - just like Jesus
It's true. I did walk on water just like Jesus. It was called a frozen lake. What's the big bloody deal?
written by unknown
Danny Glover Arrest Update
Famous actor took a union bullet for the French today in a protest against the Suit Company Sodexo. Claims the deplorable conditions of working 40 hours a week are inhuman.
written by Cuff, 18 April 2010
Christina Applegate Engagement
Spoof writer Ti Cuff officially issues day of mourning on the announcement that Christina is no longer a free woman. Such pain and suffering has not occurred since Jessica Alba tied the noose knot.
written by Cuff, 18 April 2010
Eight Grader Aces Spelling Bee
Brainiac Jedd Nooman won the world championship spelling contest and a 100,000 scholarship for correctly spelling the 'Iceland glacier volcano' question: Eyjafjallajokull
written by Cuff, 18 April 2010
Planes Sent Up To Test Ash Danger
Ryanair and Easy Jet passengers are first to take off.
written by Earl Grey, 18 April 2010
busy time for sir alex
Alex Fergusson joins alcoholics annonomous
says he never thought he had a problem. says Man.United manager as he visits recycling bin with a van load of empties
written by stantheman, 18 April 2010
Crack
If volcanoes are God's crack pipes, he's on one massive rock bender right now.
written by Coops, 18 April 2010
Blame it on the Tories
Icelandic volcanoes are not to blame but nervous Tory politicians for the unprecedented amount of ash in the upper atmosphere. If only they gave pipe smoking away, the idiotic fools.
written by whatinthe world, 18 April 2010
NORAD on ALERT
Volcanic ash might be providing cover for an alien invasion. Said one NORAD worker: "The 'space invaders' don't use jet engines and so are invulnerable to ash issues."
written by Tcoah, 18 April 2010
F1 spoiler
FIA to use Naomi Campbell's short fuse to test the electrics of F1 cars.
written by Tcoah, 18 April 2010
Turns out ...
the volcanic ash lingering over Europe is a Cranberries promotional event 'set in motion' some years ago as background for their hit song "Linger".
written by Tcoah, 18 April 2010
God appears over Manchester is the guise of a "Red Headed Demon"
God is amongst us and still a United fan, he proved it yesterday as a bolt of lightning struck the head of a "RED HEADED DEMON" called Scholes putting Manchester out of it's BLUES!
written by unknown
Iceland is buried, RIP
God has sentenced Iceland to death and buried it under tons of volcanic ashes, his reason is quite simple, Iceland released the Devil's daughter from her Loony bin, Bjork, too much even for God!
written by unknown
Space Time Continuum hole found at Old Trafford
Dr Stephen Hawking has discovered a tear in the space time contuum above Old Trafford which when when exposed to hot air causes time to expand for as long as it takes for Man United to score a goal.
written by Ricardo Fromage, 18 April 2010
The New iCom Jigga!
CCN (Crazy Cal News) LA - Emmet "Doc" Brown creates the new iCom Jigga. Misunderstanding breaks out over whether the name might be a racial slur.
written by Cal Jennings, 18 April 2010
Jesus Has No Arrest Immunity
Pontius Pilate has announced that Jesus Christ has no arrest immunity and can be arrested by Jerusalem authorities if his planned visit continues.
written by Earl Grey, 18 April 2010
Rupert Murdoch Leads Protest
Rupert Murdoch led a protest against illegal immigration in LA today. When asked why someone from Australia would protest, he replied, "I PAID for MY citizenship!"
written by Cal Jennings, 18 April 2010
