Apple Announces the i-Shoe

Funny story written by Ellie James

Sunday, 12 June 2011

image for Apple Announces the i-Shoe
It's not a wise idea to leave the i-Shoe unattended on the beach close to high tide.

Cupertino, California - Steve Jobs, the elusive CEO of Apple, Inc. has just announced he will soon unveil a new project that his designers have been working on, in conjunction with Nike.

Hipsters, Mac enthusiasts and joggers alike will soon be able to purchase the i-Shoe. Jobs claimed to have gotten the idea while his assistant was out for his morning run and was completely unreachable for 45 minutes.

The i-Shoe will be multifunctional in that it will function as an athletic shoe, but will also have several features of an i-Phone. Representatives for Apple state that the i-Shoe will have apps that can enhance the exercise experience for joggers all over the world. These apps include Heart Smart, Calorie Counter, and Neighborhood Jogger.

One of the apps that will be made available for the i-Shoe is Monster Anatomy HD-Lower Limb so that you can properly diagnose and correct any foot injuries you might have while running.

Additionally, you can have the option to download either Glee Karaoke, or Epicurious. After all, who doesn't break into songs from Glee while out for a jog, or look up recipes for that matter?

Hipsters, who don't necessarily want to work out, might want their i-Shoe to come with The New Yorker Magazine app. The shoe is designed to function as an e-reader as well. All the wearer has to do is turn the sole of the shoe towards the face in reveal the screen.

Michael Davis, an Apple employee, has jogged with an i-Shoe prototype. He says that as a shoe, it works. However, he states that the computer and phone components take a little getting used to. Davis stated that he learned quickly to plug in the ear buds before setting out for his run, and running the chords down under his shirt, shorts and down his leg so that it can plug into the shoe. "I use Velcro to keep the chord from being a complete pain in the ass," states Davis. "At first, I tried Duct tape, but soon realized that it hurt like hell and I don't need to pretend to be MacGyver when I jog."

Apple plans on releasing the i-Shoe in the fall in time for the start of school. It will be available to purchase at the Apple stores, as well as some authorized sports retail chains, and a few discount stores. The shoe will come in white or black.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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