Electrical Brainbox shock toys to be in stores for Christmas.

Funny story written by matthatt

Monday, 8 November 2010

image for Electrical Brainbox shock toys to be in stores for Christmas.

Following on from news that applying electricity to the brain enhances a person's mathematical performance, as reported by a team of researchers from the University of Oxford; a Chinese toy company has come up with a 'home use' device for doing just that.

According to a spokesperson for the manufacturers, you can choose the required settings such as, duration of extra intelligence required and amount of extra intelligence required, flick the switch and BBBUUZZZ-ZZZAAAPP hey presto! Instant brain box and mad hair. 'We think this is going to be a very popular product, especially among students looking for an extra boost of brain juice when returning back to classes after the Christmas festivities.'

The company are also working on a version for young Einstein's, so loving parents who want the best start in life for their children can give them a quick ZZZAAAPPPP POW of perspicacity in readiness for the stresses and strains of the modern infant, nursery and day care centre and if they are holding your cup of coffee while you buzz them, you wont need to warm it up in the microwave.

So we can expect to see classrooms and Crèches filled with wild hair and slightly smoking craniums as students and infants settle down for a new year of learning with their extra capacity for convoluted equations.

There are rumours already surfacing that governments and X-Factor producers are looking to have the brainbox-box banned before it even hits the shelves as they feel the impact upon society could be devastating.
'If people get more intelligent we're fucked!' said one insider.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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