Epidemiologists studying the epidemic spread of the Swine Flu have discovered that weight is a factor in the severity of the viral infection. The study published in Starvnation, a Medical Journal devoted to the defeat of Obesity and the Enjoyment of Eating shows that the Swine Influenza Virus is literally a " Chubby Chaser ": "The virus loves fat and fat people therefore are greatly adored by the Swine Influenza Virus.
"Our journal has been giving morbidly obese slobs a million excellent reasons to stop gorging their pie holes and get off their enormous butts and exercise and now here is one more good bit of motivation to, for God's sake, drop a few LB's."
In a related story really fat people have less sex and therefore less STD's and HIV and will probably live a lot longer than the fit narcissists who get laid like there's no tomorrow.
