Deadly Swine Flu Coming This Fall Says WHO, Now On Highest Alert!

Funny story written by Bureau

Saturday, 20 June 2009

image for Deadly Swine Flu Coming This Fall Says WHO, Now On Highest Alert!
PREPARE FOR THE FALL NOW!

People seem to be sitting around with their finger up their ass and watching everything from talent contests on TV to the next movie date when they need to inform themselves about the Swine Flu, according to the World Health Organization.

With the first flu pandemic in 41 years officially declared only last week by The World Health Organization (WHO), companies are again being urged to make sure that business continuity plans are in place and they're prepared for the outbreak.

With the number of Swine Flu cases headed for 90,000 worldwide, the WHO raised the pandemic warning level from phase five to six -- IT'S HIGHEST ALERT!

Hospitals are preparing, some for the worst, because once this hits, you're not going to care who you're voting for on Dances With The Stars, say experts.

"There's really no excuse for Americans and those in the western world", states Winifred Howell a WHO spokesperson. "You people have all the information most doctors have there on the internet and the very latest, but what are you reading about?

"Morning TV News should be telling people how to prepare for this thing instead of showcasing their coming night's program and the evening news tells us about Michelle Obama's garden at the White House!"

Other members of the WHO are telling companies that we work for what they should be doing NOW before their work force is cut in half.

"This thing may change forms every few days. Schools and factories may have to be temporarily closed. So will the theaters and sporting events.

"It could even come down to your very survival."

The WHO's advice: gather up enough food you need for a month so you don't have to get out and mingle with people sneezing and coughing. Put some bottled water away. Pretend there's a hurricane coming."

"Because the Hurricane named "H1N1" is DEFINITELY headed your way, wherever you live!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more