Was Brian May's PhD astronomy thesis the brains behind Virgin's rocket disaster?

Written by queen mudder

Friday, 3 August 2007

image for Was Brian May's PhD astronomy thesis the brains behind Virgin's rocket disaster?
Queen guitarist Brian May say he is fascinated by black holes and zodiac dust

London - (Asstronomy Mess): FBI investigators probing last week's fatal Virgin Intergalactic rocket blast have shifted their probe to Queen guitarist Brian May who is reported today to have handed in his astronomy PhD thesis for consideration by London's Imperial College Astrophysics Department.

May, 60, has been described as being to astronomy what NASA's Captain Lisa Nowak is to adult-issue diapers.

Sources close to the disaster-riddled Virgin space program refused to confirm or deny that May has been working as a hired consultant in the commercial space flight project which bombed last week killing three and seriously wounding many.

The rock guitarist says he carried out his doctorial observational work in Tenerife where he studied the formation of "zodiacal dust" - a substance some believe to be closely related to "angel dust".

May has reportedly written 48,000 words called Radical Philosophies of Zodiacal Dust to astrophysics Professor Paul Nandra "who has been my inspiration and mentor for as long as I can remember".

"If they make me a Doctor of Astrophysics maybe I can get a job at NASA as an official adviser," May said at his home today.

May recently ghosted a book for Astronomer Royal Sir Patrick Moore called "Black Holes: My Role in their Formation" as well as the original lyrics to that mega-blockbusting hit "Dark Side of the Moon".

The Royal Society also accredits him as the genius behind much of Professor Stephen Hawking's incomprehensible gibberish.

"I am certain that Brian May is a brilliant astrophysicist," astrophysicist Dr Garik Israelian said today.

May says he made his first astronomical observations in Tenerife in 1971 when abducted by aliens into a cigar-shaped UFO.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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