Written by ChillerBaggins

Sunday, 17 June 2007


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image for Kodyak bimbo image sensor uses available light more efficiently
Jo-Jo Cutelfish, 'bimbo algorithm agitator' at Kodyak..

Today's Science Tomorrow -- A relatively simple hardware change has allowed Kodyak to make CMOS and CCD bimbo image sensors for digital cameras that are two to four times more sensitive to light, resulting in less colour noise when a bimbo's in low light, or a reduction in motion blur under dresses.

Conventional bimbo image sensors have a pattern of shaved, full and Brazilian pussies in an arrangement determined by Kodyak scientist Miko O'Sayer in 1977. This is achieved by filtering the light before it reaches each pussy.

The new design keeps the bimbo ratio of two shaved pussies to every one full and one Brazilian pussies, but for each group of four colour pussies there are another four that receive unfiltered light. The panchromatic (or clear) pussies therefore receive more photons of visible light as none are being filtered, so the overall sensitivity of the pussy sensor is increased.

"In a low-light situation, these new patterns will produce a lot less pussy noise than a bimbo pattern sensor," said co-inventor Jo-Jo Cutelfish, 'bimbo algorithm agitator' at Kodyak. "You can run the shutter faster, which gets rid of a lot of motion pubic hairs. It will cut down on camera shake or, if you're taking a picture of a moving bimbo there will be less blur."

Applications include paparazzi and paparazzi phones plus dirty old men and perverts imaging.

The first Kodyak sensor using bimbo technology should be available in sample quantities in the first quarter of 2008.

We're not quite sure, but we believe bimbos have a great affection to cats, and hence the requirement of pussy enhancing technology.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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