Dear Mrs and Mr HD Tops Sex Advice Charts

Written by Pointer

Friday, 2 February 2007


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Frigidia Yikesberg finally gives up on Frosty

Kick back Kinsey. Just relax Johnson and Masters. Roll over Ruth Westheimer. And Don't even Dr Drew! Mrs and Mr Havinghurst Dawurst have arrived as the sex columnists extraordinaire! Despite the fact that the newest latest favoritiest sex advisors are fleeing for their lives from some Roman Catholic Clerical mass murderer named Tittslesin, their sex help has become #1 in the world.

The mutually preorgasmic couple, Mrs and Mr John Gasden from Shiboygan are swearing by the great counsel they received: "We went right out and purchased the most powerful spa we could afford.The Dawursts were so right! SpaGasms are Choice!" (see JRN Ombligo Knows...)

The Dawurst's first miracle couple were referring to E.Rogersenous Zone's discovery of "orgasm in a jacuzzi" that The Havinghurst Dawursts have been popularizing.Letters are now pouring in, reported the seventy syndicates carrying the SexGuru's radio,TV,Skin-ternet and print media advice.

Frigidia Yikesberg was the most recent queryier praising the SexSensei's counsel: "I just couldn't get my clitoris hot enough for orgasm here in Norway. I tried heating pads, Ben-Gay and even AtomicBalm SexHot Lubricant! Nothing turned the trick.Then I called the Dawursts and they knew just what to do.

"Stop fucking Frosty!" Mrs HD advised, "That snow man may have a magic silk hat but that icy thang down there is freezin' your cootch!".

"Once I stopped dating snowmen I came and came like there was no tooomorrow!",Frigidia secreted.Testimonial likes this can be found all over the cover of the SexImans best seller What Gets Repressed Will Be Sexpressed.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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