The Blue Square will be removed in the next version of Microsoft Office

Funny story written by IainB

Tuesday, 18 December 2012

image for The Blue Square will be removed in the next version of Microsoft Office
Before DVDs, before CDs, there were FDs, which were rubbish, but the best we had

Since the dawn of personal computers, to save a document, users have pressed the blue square. Back in the dark ages of the eighties and nineties, the operators of these archaic machines recognised the blue square for what it was, a picture of a so-called 'floppy diskette'.

"It was a nice simple shape to draw back when computers couldn't draw very well," said computer historian, Brandon Whelks. "Now of course, the blue square looks much better."

Sadly though the meaning of the blue square as the button to press to save is widely known the reason the square is blue has been lost.

"Floppy diskettes," said Whelks, "were what documents were stored on. They were a bit like flash drives, but couldn't really hold that much information. Sometimes you needed seven or eight floppy diskettes to hold one document. And do you know what? They weren't even floppy!"

A fingernail-sized compact-flash card bought for twenty-five pounds in a popular high street retailer just before all the prices were slashed because the store went bust, can hold as much information as every single floppy diskette ever made, and still have enough room left over for a video of a fat man rolling in piles of floppy diskettes.

With the loss of the blue square, something has to replace it.

"There was a lot of discussion," said Whelks. "In the end, they settled on the word 'save'."

As usual, any change to Microsoft Office will be greeted by a massive uproar of the user base. News of the loss of the blue square has already spawned three thousand blogs, twelve million Facebook status updates, and three times that in tweets.

William Oddy, a Twitcher from Berkshire had tweeted "Save? WTF is that supposed to mean? #bringbackthebluesquare"

"Putting four letters on the screen to replace the blue square makes no sense!" Oddy said. "What does it even stand for? It's going to be hard to know what button to press to save the document. Bring back the blue square! That's what I say."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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