Apple announce that Mountain Lion downloads top 3 million

Written by IainB

Friday, 3 August 2012

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Mountain Lions, the biggest iPhone users of the animal kingdom

Apple Computers have revealed that Mountain Lion downloads have topped three million in the first week.

"I didn't realise that there were that many mountain lions in the world," said head of development, Ellie James. "When I last checked there were only two hundred thousand left in the wild. This must mean that they are all downloading multiple times."

James is not surprised that the wild feline is downloading,, although there are very few apps available for any undomesticated animals.

"The iPhone is very easy to use," she said. "We designed the interface with simplicity in mind, so even an animal with huge claws on the end of thick feet could do it."

Analysis of Mountain Lion downloads have shown that apps that show random pictures of cats in humorous poses is the most popular, whilst they also like the app that makes farting noises.

"We think that Mountain Lions like a bit of a giggle," said James. "And why not? It's very stressful being hunted to the edge of extinction."

Further analysis has shown that Mountain Lions are the biggest group of animals downloading.

"We only had five Rhino downloads," she said. "And Pandas are completely under represented with zero downloads. We will be doing an ad campaign specifically aimed at Pandas."

Apple Labs are planning on producing a range of apps specifically aimed at Mountain Lions.

"We think they might appreciate a location app to help them avoid hunters and find prey," she said. "It may be a big seller."

Nobody knows where Mountain Lions are getting the money to pay for an iPhone contract, never mind paying for the apps themselves.

"Perhaps they are stealing people's identities," said James. "Mountain Lions are renowned for identity theft."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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