Need to detonate a bomb? There's an app for that

Written by IainB

Tuesday, 10 July 2012

image for Need to detonate a bomb? There's an app for that
Ring, ring, BOOM!

Syrian App company, Kaboom, have launched their first, and possibly last applelet, for the iPhone: uXB.

"A lot of people don't realise," said App World! editor Mac Buck, "that using a mobile phone to detonate a bomb is much harder than they make it look on TV. There's quite a lot of wiring, plus is it detonated by ringing the phone? By timer? What about movement? Well, uXB solves all of these problems in one neat package."

Using the supplied cable as a detonation cord, one end goes into the bomb, the other into the iPhone's port. There are then a wealth of options for the budding terrorist.

"First off, you decide how long you want to wait," said Buck, "but don't choose anything longer than four hours as the app is quite battery intensive, and could quite easily power down before it goes off."

After this, there is a simple option to detonate by phone call, plus further options to use the inbuilt accelerometer to detect if the bomb is being tampered with.

"If somebody moves the phone even a little bit," said Buck, "Kaboom."

There is even a GPS option, that will detonate the bomb when it reaches a specific location, and will even provide spoken directions to the target.

"Probably best to have the iPhone on charge using this," said Buck. "Otherwise it will power down before you get to the bit where the phone says 'You have now reached your destina...'"

Although the app worked flawlessly in tests, detonating successfully every time, Buck has reservations about giving the applelet five stars.

"It's a good app," he said. "The only reservation I have is that it destroys the iPhone. And as it needs an iPhone 3G or higher, it's a tragic waste. If they made it iPhone 1 compatible, it would be a perfect app. I wonder what the GPS co-ordinates are for my ex-wife's house?"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more