Are you a fan of The Only Way is Essex? There's an app for that

Funny story written by IainB

Friday, 13 April 2012

image for Are you a fan of The Only Way is Essex? There's an app for that
All teeth are automatically whitened.

The producers of The Only Way Is Essex have released their own applelet for the iPhone called the iJazzle.

"I downloaded this app," said App World! editor, Mac Buck. "I've got to be honest and say: uh?"

The app applies pictures of diamonds to every screen on the iPhone, making it sparkly. Additionally, any photos in which teeth are shown automatically have the teeth whitened to a brilliant white.

"I'm sure the technology is very clever," said Buck. "I've seen a million pointless apps, but if I was to compile a list of pointless apps, iJazzle would be at the top."

Buck proved this by downloading iList and compiling a list of pointless apps, starting with iJazzle.

"Perhaps this comes down to not really knowing what the hell The Only Way Is Essex actually is," said Buck. "I get the feeling that even if I did know, I still would think this the pointless app to measure all other pointless apps against."

The app costs $4.99 or £15 in the UK. Despite this extortionate price tag, it is still being downloaded by the hundreds.

"I put it's surge up the app charts as it appearing on the show, or something," said Buck. "And the brain-dead fashion followers who watch the show just have to iJazzle their phone like which ever character presumably did it."

The Only Way Is Essex are set to release iJazzle2, which promises to do nothing extra from iJazzle, but cost twice as much.

"I've not seen so much fleecing, since I downloaded Angry Sheep," said Buck.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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