Snow? There's an app for that

Funny story written by IainB

Tuesday, 7 February 2012

image for Snow? There's an app for that
Here's one I made earlier

French applelet designer, Le App, have released a new app specifically for snow lovers everywhere: iGloo.

"We don't get much snow here in California," said Mac Buck, editor of App World!. "So I've not been able to try this app out in the wild, so to speak. However, I nipped down to The Ice Station to try it in their indoor ski slope."

According to Buck, the app has a few features that snow lovers everywhere will find incredibly useful.

"First off," said Buck, "when installed on an iPad the vibration function acts like a waxed surface allowing app owners to snowboard with the best of them. For beginners haptics show them where to place their feet to get the best out of any slope."

That isn't as good as it sounds, apparently.

"Unfortunately, this means snowboarding in bare feet," said Buck. "I'd never realised this, but snow is freezing cold. It's like colder than the water out of the office cooler!"

That isn't all the app can do, however, as it also acts as a survival tool.

"By heating the phone using the same calculations as iRon," said Buck. "The iPhone becomes a perfect ice saw, and I was able to construct a perfect igloo by following the on screen instructions and slicing through the snow to create the blocks."

Though this aspect of the app worked flawlessly, Buck did not enjoy the experience.

"First off," he said. "I didn't really dress appropriately. Sandals and shorts with a Gucci vest top are not the clothes for snow. The app never once mentioned that warm clothes were needed. A massive oversight in my opinion."

And the other problem?

"The Ice Station," he said, "apparently do not take kindly to people building a perfect igloo on one of their slopes. They said that because igloos are white and snow is white that skiers kept hitting it. That's hardly my fault is it? I think it's grossly unfair to ban me just for that."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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